➹BEEPER

[intheblanks]

"It had better be an emergency."
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[intheblanks]

[He takes it, tiny against his (how weird is this) but stops, for a second, to look down.]

Then who cares what anyone else thinks?

[eggsac]

Don't you have feelings?

[intheblanks]

Of course.

[He's only human, Saya.]

Listen, you don't have to let anyone else tell you what's the right and wrong way to be. You can choose whether you're going to be different-weird, or different-interesting. People will go along with what you believe about yourself. Personally I think the second option suits you more.

[eggsac]

[She holds tight to his hand, like a lifeline]

Is that what you do?

[intheblanks]

[Busted, ever so slightly.]

I'm better at it now than I used to be. But I didn't have a smart, handsome doctor to talk to about it all I wanted.

[eggsac]

[She sounds a little skeptical]

Are you talking about yourself?

[intheblanks]

[Wide eyes.]

Do I fit that description?

[eggsac]

I think you're very handsome, but I don't know about smart.

[Well. She is honest.]

[intheblanks]

That's why I told you I was a doctor. Unlike handsome princes, for example, doctors have to be smart.

[He cannot. Hide. The smugness.]

Even the ones who look like handsome princes.

[And on cue, a bow and a gesture to the left.]

The kitchen.

[eggsac]

[She goes into the kitchen and finds a stool, climbs it, and sits]

Can you be both?

[intheblanks]

[He goes to rummage through the cupboard.]

Yes. You can also be smart and beautiful.

[eggsac]

No, I mean a doctor and a handsome prince?

[She tries not to fidget but it's haaaaard]

[intheblanks]

Hmm. [There is indeed bread here, and butter. Now, condiments.] Maybe, but I think Princeing might be harder work than it looks. What do you like on your toast?

[eggsac]

Jam, please.

No Marmite.

[Spare her.]

I think it would be very difficult to be a princess.

[intheblanks]

Wrong household for marmite.

[Chase wrinkles his nose, but there's a not-quite scraped clean jar of jam in one cupboard and he holds it up for approval. Raspberry.]

I know one you can ask, if she's around.

[eggsac]

[She reaches for it with both hands]

You know a real princess?

I think you are a prince.

[intheblanks]

[Go jam crazy, tinyspider. He's oddly enjoying this real!food thing.]

I could be if I married her. Think I should?

[eggsac]

[She's using a spoon to basically eat jam with a little toast]

I don't know. Would it make you happy?

[intheblanks]

She's a very nice girl, but she's a little young for me.

[And it's possible you'd suck him up like that jam. But Rosella has always had the benefit of purely platonic interest.]

And I don't want to have to wear tights to my wedding.

[eggsac]

[She has jam on her chin, now]

I don't think a castle would be very nice to live in, anyway. And it's always snowing where princesses live.

[intheblanks]

And you can never completely trust old ladies or red apples.

[He's buttered some toast for himself, and ignores it to snag a piece of kitchen roll and pass it across, tapping his own chin to indicate the problem.]

You spilt some of your inevitable sugar rush.

[eggsac]

[She touches her chin then cleans it up]

Or men with beards.

[intheblanks]

You should never trust those, anyway.

[He raises his eyebrows.]

What do you think of this place, to live in?

[eggsac]

[She thinks about it]

It's big but whoever usually sleeps in the room with the clothes has too many shoes.

[intheblanks]

[It's not a laugh. He's coughing.]

I'll let her know. That's where you woke up?