intheblanks | ➹BEEPER

Of course. Look, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.

I'm not, I promise. Just wanted to make sure. I mean—

[She doesn't want to throw around "friend" again and she doesn't want to throw in "concerned," either, though both are true. So she goes with - ]

I've known you the longest here. [ - which says a bit of both.] I know it doesn't feel like it to you, but whatever the case, I'm fond and I miss hanging out with you properly. That's all.

[It doesn't really feel like it to him, no. However many little fragments of a history here he's collected.]

You've known me the longest, really? I don't think I've asked how long it's been.

[She has to pause to think how long, exactly. She hit four years in December.]

Definitely before I got to my first year here. [She breathes out a laugh.] I've been acquainted with other people from around then, but actually known? That's you. Would've been Amory if he hung around.

[He showed up barely a month after her. Odd that she kept track of these things, but what else can you do here?]

I didn't realise.

[There's the squeak of an office chair as he sits, a slow exhalation.]

Sometimes, when I stop by [Building 12, he means, the apartment that never really belonged to him] ...it feels like other people are there.

[She shakes her head on her end, though he can't see her. Not his fault. The next thing has her smiling a little and it leaks into her voice a bit, but it's quiet.]

Still feels like that to me, too.

You'd probably be able to tell me who some of them are.

...Am I different?

I might, yeah. Just say the word.

[Pause.]

I don't know. [Honestly.] A little. Loads of things happen in four years.

Tell me about it. [And it's been six years, really, for him. Three years he barely remembers, here. Three more years he'll never forget, back home. He's missing the first three, everyone else is missing the latter.]

I don't know if I can be whoever I was to you.

I wouldn't ask for that, anyway. A little unfair, don't you think?

[And she's living four years she shouldn't at all. She's meant to be sixteen, meant to be finishing school, meant to be living this completely different life. It's how it works here and she knows that (doesn't mean it doesn't suck sometimes).]

I'm not about to pretend you're the exact same bloke from before any more than you are, Chase. So call it getting reacquainted.

[She chuckles.]

Too sappy?

Claire thought it was unfair that I couldn't be.

[There's a touch of regret it pointing that out.]

I don't think it's sappy unless you're planning to reacquaint me with a cutesy nickname.

[She didn't expect him to bring up Claire. But what he brings up... well, that was a hard thing all around.]

That's not your fault. Maybe my brothers were the same about me.

[Her brothers surely thought it was unfair that she'd grown into someone they only half knew, sometimes.]

Never fear, Dr Chase—I never once came up with a nickname for you, cutesy or otherwise. Unless you're dying for one.

[He never mentions the girl to anyone else, let alone by name. But perhaps they have some shared ghosts in that apartment building.]

My fault or not, it still hurt her. I can't blame her, I was mad at people for not knowing me, too. [And he pauses a moment.] I mean, apparently no one even told you my nickname.

Wombat. I think.

[She remembers it, vaguely. But given that she turned him into a fox once, wombats aren't the first thing to come to her mind.]

I was mad at you. Not about leaving or forgetting— [Pause.] Okay, a little about forgetting. But mostly for upsetting Claire, but that... It was the City. Not like you traded away all that with the deities.

What? No. [And that genuinely doesn't ring much of a bell - House might have used the term once or twice - but the correction isn't quite so genuine.] Butch.

[This could backfire, of course.]

I guess I could have traded to get the memories back. But I'm not sure I want them. [And that had made people angry, too.] Three years back home - whatever mattered to me here, I went back and forgot it. I don't need more reason to regret what began to matter to me there.

Of course not.

[She... is not going to ask after the nickname and continue on.]

And look, anyone could trade for their old memories, I'm sure. But I haven't heard of it happening, have you? Apparently I'd been here twice before the four years I remember and I never did it. And me and missing memories... [She exhales, almost a laugh but falling short.] Anyway. It's your head. People don't think it's a luxury to decide what you want in it, but I do.

There aren't too many people left who remember me from then, anyway. I guess the point's moot.

[Far more people who don't really know him now - but whose fault is that?]

I guess so.

[She hums absently, then chuckles.]

Think of it this way, there are some things best forgotten.

[Like the fox incident.]

➹BEEPER

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL

→ CALL