➹BEEPER

[intheblanks]

"It had better be an emergency."
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[synanthrope]

You don't see this as a defect in my system.

[She reaches up, so her hands are spread on his chest]

I will always be this way, Robert. I will always have no emotions except for the ones you give me. The only competition you have is my brother. Every emotion I feel is linked to either you, or him.

If someone told me that, I would think that was weakness.

[intheblanks]

Loving anyone is. [He can admit to that, perhaps surprisingly readily. It's always been his biggest vulnerability. Well, one of them.]

I don't... know if anyone's really loved me, before.

[synanthrope]

Well I do.

[She presses her hands up, to cup his face, and there's a measure of tenderness there, something that's usually missing]

And even if I wanted to, I can't stop.

[intheblanks]

[He tilts his head to pres a kiss into the curve of her palm.]

I don't want to make you weak.

[synanthrope]

What you want, it seems, doesn't matter.

Do you still want me?

[She asks with very little sentimentality. It's the typical kind of Saya straightforwardness.]

[intheblanks]

[It's not too dark to see the look she gets in response.]

I always will. [He has a feeling that he always has, even if his earliest memories of her are fragments he's never completely pieced together.] You said you were afraid for me. Why?

[synanthrope]

I can't protect you from everything.

I can't even try.

[Because there are dangers she doesn't understand, or has no control over]

And normally I would just dismiss that. But I can't, with you. It's illogical.

[intheblanks]

[This is a little of what he'd meant in bringing up his fragile human body.]

At some point, you know you'll lose me.

[synanthrope]

I'll hurt you.

Not physically.

[intheblanks]

[He's about to ask how, but pauses, and wonders if maybe he's completely missed the point.]

Is that what's keeping you awake? [He shifts, pulls back just a little.] If there's something we need to talk about–

[synanthrope]

I have never, since I turned, thought about the possibility of emotional pain as something I could dole out.

[She looks up, and she whispers. She is more human than she's ever been, just at this moment]

What if I hurt you?

[intheblanks]

[Is it a curse? It's past midnight. But dismissing this would be to dismiss the look in her eyes and Chase can't do that. He kisses her, fingers crading back through her hair. Kisses her again.]

I love you. What if you do?

[synanthrope]

You trust me with that?

[It's not a curse. It's emotions, finally working their way up from the depths.]

[intheblanks]

I've never made loving you conditional on your trying not to. [Saya. He already has more from you that he expected.] The fact that you are's an unexpected bonus.

[synanthrope]

This is difficult for me.

[She pauses, and touches his face]

Thank you. For waking up.

[intheblanks]

The sudden, late night feeling that you're not good enough? [He raises his eyebrows, settling down against her.] Sometimes you're more human than you think.

[synanthrope]

You're good enough for me, you know.

[She tells him with that frank, brutal honestly she does so well. No sentimentality at all]

[intheblanks]

[He can believe she's honest, but he can't believe that she's right. Still.]

And I fell in love with a woman who told me she'd never be able to love me back. [You know, in a classic example of not even slightly learning from his mistakes.] She'd never want a relationship, let alone an exclusive one. Look at what I got. If I've let you think I'm not happy, then I'm an idiot.

[synanthrope]

[She stares up him, and leans up to kiss him again, before twisting them so she's curled around him on her side]

You're not an idiot.

[intheblanks]

Then stop thinking you need to apologise to me for being what you are. I know what you are. Both sides. Neither of them scare me.

[synanthrope]

[She considers that, and then there's a nod against his shoulder]

All right.

[intheblanks]

[He smiles at that little nod, resting his chin lightly against the top of her head.]

This part's new, though.

[synanthrope]

I don't think you mean the physical touch.

[intheblanks]

[He's teasing. His voice takes on a certain tone (and does so deliberately, now, so that she has a warning.]

Don't think I've ever had a needy girlfriend before. Finally I'll have something to bitch about with the guys at work.

[He's usually the needy girlfriend, lets be honest here.]

[synanthrope]

[She considers that statement, but then:]

I don't think that one midnight discussion about emotions qualifies as needy. If I do it more than once, you can complain.